Poussiere d'ange (Angel Dust) Happy Birthday

This song has been stuck in my head since I found out about my little sister being pregnant and since I saw our sister write that she will be une bonne maman juste pas metenant just like in this songs lyrics......

you will be a good mother but not right now. it broke my heart to see those words written and I couldn't believe it because as long as there is love and devotion today or tomorrow my little sister would be a loving mother to her child.

I am affect by the life and deth of her unborn child as though it were my own, perhaps that is because she is my little sister since she has been less then 1 years old I have watched her grow. There have always been complicated feelings where she has been involved as she took my place as being my fathers youngest daughter. She got to be my fathers little girl when all I had ever dreamed of was being "Daddy's lil girl" but I loved her so much I could barely even muster the energy to be jealous of her. I was hurt when he decided he would adopt her but she was my dear sweet and cute little sister anyways and I loved her.

I found out that she thought I hated her I had never heard something so outrageous before. I am awkward with her because of the different emotions that were always involved because the older she got the more attitude she got, and when she was angry she knew just how to hurt you. She knew the most painful things to a person's heart and she used them she once told me I have all your fathers love and he loves me more then you and it cut like a knife because it was a deep rooted fear/doubt and also seemed like the truth as my father neglected more then anything else.

my sister has lived a hard life, her parents and my father have put her in situations she never should have dealt with.
Her mother did no set a good example for her and she started to become a lost cause, until at the age of 16 she found out she was pregnant.
Pamela has changed from doing speeds and smoking up all the time and getting drunk she went cold turkey the minute she found out she was pregnant.
She wanted to do right by her child she wanted and already loved her unborn baby, she was willing to spend the rest of her life loving that child.

No one wanted her to keep the baby least of all it's father, he told her right away she was having an abortion left no room for discussion plain and simple your getting rid of it.
The only people in the family who wanted her to keep it was her mother and I, she wanted to raise her child and I wanted her to give it life even if I had to raise it the first little while myself.
She wasted no time writing it all over her facebook about how she loved her baby and would never stop loving it and how she couldnt raise it alone and with no support, she wrote about how she would never forgive her boyfriend for making her go through with terminating her pregnancy.
My one hope had been that she would be too far along to abort , my wish didn't come true sadly.
I had nightmares about it and cried over it and today when I heard her broken voice on the other end of my phone i wished I could hold her tightly in my arms and just cry with her.
My little brat of a sister who always had so much spunk spirit and attitude was a spiritless broken soul and it cuts and burns like a knife coated in vinegar through my heart.

the English lyrics of the song are as follows

Take a deep breath
Do not stay upright
Open your eyes
I promise that you will be better

You've received a huge blow
A shot of life in the womb
A gust of wind in your life
However remain calm, I beg

REF: Just at the wrong time
Angels dust you fell within
You will be a super mommy
But not now, not now

A small spiral you took for it's house
It's not a girl, it's not a boy
it's not a aries nor a pieces
Forget that its not possible
You will lose balance
Take my hand I'll take you far away
One of being back tomorrow

Just at the wrong time
angel dust you fell into
You'll be a super mommy
But not now, not now

We're going to bring back
The angel in his shoes
He made mistakes but not serious
he may come back if you stay wise

Just at the wrong time
angel dust you fell in to
You'll be a super mommy
But not now, not now

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This is a song that I would want to show my little sister but wont because I dont want to make her cry.